JesusFreak84

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Crash Landing by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Crash Landing

Standing in the dark, With this weak heart Under me, the ground starts shifting Spineless back to the wall, Can't handle it all I've tried my best to just ignore Let me go Everything's crashing 'round my head Doing nothing, better off dead Been waiting enough time for life to begin Just give up, run off Before you're dragged down with me Throw in the towel on the floor All I wanted was more than this lot I'm given Ignored my cracks and my flaws, tried to gloss over them all But they won't be ignored Just go Reality crashing 'round my head Life's made into nothing another Monday to dread Break away and out, far away from me And maybe, maybe

Apology by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Apology

My face, my voice, my mind never matching So into walls, I'll keep crashing The wall between me, between her, between you You never know what I'll do! Crazy a more colloquial term 'cause all these rules that you follow, I'll never learn Apologizing for my words for the thousandth time, Drowning in these verbal sins of mine! Chorus: Step forth and say, "How do you do?" Hand out, smile wide, I'll never understand these rules You can't get inside of my mind I'll just say it's all fine I can see in your face that you're gettin' real bored Won't tell you how much I adore Your kind laugh, your sanity If you only could see what's become of me! C

The Spirits by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

The Spirits

I run fast and hard Following the spirits I run far away Fleeing the spirits I turn every which way Fleeing bad spirits Bad Spirits says He Bad Spirits know I Yet the spirits wish embrace Running from the spirits They stalk and pursue Seeking good spirits Good Spirit is He Good Spirit want I Yet I run and do not yet catch Saintly spirits They seek and find Knock and the door does open Praying for my spirit Saintly Spirits know He Saintly Spirits become I When the race and hunt are won

Three Faces by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Three Faces

Three faces Are any me? The first I wear to fill others with glee The first I wear so that with them I may be The second I wear because I believe it right The second I wear even alone, in dark of night The third I wear under deepest skin The third you found and now trouble begins The second face ties into the first If they saw the third, I do fear the worst A synthesis, perhaps, would be nice But doomed they all are, should I take your advice

Alone by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Alone

Wandering at midnight Don't know where to go This just doesn't feel right How I miss you so God brought me an angel A true friend In the form of a man Time took you away from me So I run As fast as I can Through a night So cold and dark Since you went away, now I'm alone Night black and bleak Left all on my own You believed in me When I could not trust myself Always believed In the woman I could be In you I saw beauty So noble I'd given up hope To ever Meet someone like you But it's been... So cold and dark Since you went away Night black and bleak Left all on my own People around me Lights abounding This place

Against My Will by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Against My Will

Walking by Yeah ya caught my eye Caught my mind, too But you're not mine to have And what I'd have to become... I won't go that way Won't walk that road 'Cause that's not Where I wanna go home {A Chorus} This is against my will It's against all sense It's all against [all] my will Swallowing this bitter pill (x2) {B Chorus} But what is my But what is my But what is my But what is my will? [2 senses: what of it, and what IS it?] You want my blessing How you dress Who you're undressing It's something I can't give Not yours to hold... I wish I could bring you this way Travel down this road Bring you with Where I wanna go home A & B Chor

Eulogy by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Eulogy

When you smile at me, your face and your eyes are so beautiful that I want to cry I see it and I stand, accused, and guilty, of every ugly thing I've said I stand cleansed and accused by the same name that frees and imprisons me Look my way, that I may know happiness, however frail, however fleeting I compare my shallow waters to your depths and I want to drown My identity I count for nothing I will lose it tomorrow for one drop of your heart, your mind Your Beauty has you surrounded by girls like me, every one better than the last, better than me Would that I could be even a fraction in your soul as they are All the same I fear lov

untitled 3 by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

untitled 3

Drippin' my blood down the drain, I scream the voiceless scream, Dream the nightmare dream. Why did I do it? One moment, my pink arm, The next, cool steel, Then, crimson red and black awareness Psychoanalyze this, Like you really care For the tarnished remains that were once a little girl My corpse You'll see it again soon, and you won't have me to kick around anymore Watch all your problems (and mine and me) drip out Drip down As I lose myself in the abyss As I lose My light My line My life Into the abyss

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Apology by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Apology

The Spirits by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

The Spirits

Alone by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Alone

Mirror mirror by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

Mirror mirror

It's kind of freakishly grotesque Like a train wreck or car accident You know it's wrong and tasteless to look but you can't draw your eyes away Unless someone catches you looking then you turn your head And the girl who caught you figures she must have just been imagining things she does that sometimes There was this one time someone told her they could make her pretty She foolishly believed in the good will of humanity and followed along Oh, they dolled her up alright, only to leave her to the wolves who saw her as food no matter what the outside carcass looked like She gave up on pretty and let nature take its toll There was this other t

Looking Forward by JesusFreak84, literature

It was a Poem by JesusFreak84, literature

untitled 3 by JesusFreak84, literature

Literature

untitled 3

Watchers 11

Treeps

DeathHarbinger

ryupower

goldenspines

Sugar-High-Otaku

WrestlingOtaku

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Zelda27

animetedskier

SuDonym

Frankencow

Watching 40

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SCP-Foundation

JPBeaubien

sirarles

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marzlapin

Xabbu-Djibouti

ZIM402

quarridors

Malakym

fyre-flye

jinkies36

TaintedInk

AIyxz

SlytherinPadfoot

Azildin

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It was a Poem by JesusFreak84, literature

It was a Poem

JesusFreak84

About JesusFreak84

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United States
Deviant for 18 years
She / Her

Badges

My Bio

Just an otaku who should be kept away from Notepad.exe

One of these days I'll care enough to finish this...

Favourite Movies

The Exorcism of Emily Rose

Favourite TV Shows

I don't even have TV. I hate it with a passion.

Favourite Bands / Musical Artists

Lots of random stuff

Favourite Books

The Screwtape Letters

Favourite Writers

Chesterton, Tolkien, Lewis, etc.

Favourite Games

Dragon Age

Favourite Gaming Platform

Tools of the Trade

A desktop I lovingly assembled myself

Other Interests

Anime, theology, history, tech, putzing around...

Posts

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JesusFreak84

Oct 25, 2010

Because Janet can't sleep...

0 min read

...and finally cleared out all of her DA notices.  I even updated my e-mail address =-p Umm...still alive...no job...2 years of searching, 4 interviews, bupkis.  Student loans'll default March 2011ish. Aristicishly, I've mostly been doing RP in Second Life, which has really been a chance to take my desire to write in a direction that I find comes more naturally.  It combines all the hours I spent reading and writing stories from childhood onward with the creative collaboration of my band years (which are still ongoing.   I'm now the community band's web monkey.)  If you're in SL, look up Everwind and you'll see where I'm spending the bigges

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JesusFreak84

Dec 26, 2009

Whee still alive

0 min read

Merry CHRISTmas to all!  ^_^/

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JesusFreak84

Jun 23, 2006

Mini-rant

0 min read

Will somebody PLEASE explain to me why I can only write anything real or good when I'm depressed.  When I'm happy and want to express it in writing, I can't.  Anything that does come up looks shallow, thin, and plastic, and I hate it as soon as the least little bit of whatever "high" starts to fade. Seems I can only be worth anything when I hate myself.